Episode 236: Chobani Hell

Outline
03:13 - Why won't people sit next to me on the bus? Every morning on my way to work, I'm one of the first to get on the bus. As the bus fills up, I end up being the last person sitting alone. People will often opt to stand before sitting next to me. I'm very quiet, fairly well-dressed, average-looking guy who showers every morning. Help me brothers! Am I just being paranoid, or is there a method to being the cool guy on the bus everyone wants to sit next to? -- Potentially-Creepy Bus Guy In Seattle

13:38 - Y - Sent in by Rachel Spurling, from Yahoo Answers user Rob, who asks: Which celebrity would you like to stroke your hair if you were dying?

you are lying on your death bed and are about to merge with the infinite. you can summon any celebrity living or dead to stoke you hair as you fade away. who would it be?

20:24 - Brothers, I have a birthday coming up, and every year I'm plagued by the sheer number of happy birthday wishes that I get. They range from close friends and family, to basically total randos. I have no idea how to respond. Do I simply like every statues? Do I respond to everyone with a heartfelt paragraph? Is it rude to only respond to some? Do I completely ignore all of them? Am I good? -- No Clue In North Carolina

28:00 - MZ - Sponsored by OneMonth. Sponsored by Nature Box. Personal message from Adam Ford. Personal message from Casey and Matt.

39:22 - Haunted Doll Watch

43:36 - Y - Sent in by Eric Laurenson, from Yahoo Answers user Christina, who asks: IVE ALWAYS WONDERED THIS!!!!?

when you send out a text message and before the other person recieves the message where does it go??? it has always been picking at my brain...

47:53 - Hi brothers. I don't know what to do about invitations to my Super Bowl party. My friend group has a couple in it who recently split up due to one member of the couple finding someone new. I already (stupidly) told both members about the Super Bowl get-together. One person says she will not attend if her ex's new significant other is there. I haven't yet sent an email. How do I delicately make sure that everyone that is there will not explode in a horrible rage fight? -- Super Befuddled For The Super Bowl

52:08 - Housekeeping
 * Recommended Maximum Fun Network podcasts: Sawbones, Bunker Buddies, The Adventure Zone, Jordan Jesse Go, Judge John Hodgman, Stop Podcasting Yourself, Throwing Shade, The Goosedown, Lady To Lady, Baby Geniuses, Destination DIY, Song Exploder, The Memory Palace, PopRocket, The Flop House

57:44 - FY - Sent in by Drew Davenport, from Yahoo Answers user Funky Poo, who asks: "How much is Drake's dad worth?"