Episode 81: Pizza Roll Suicide

Outline
00:40 - Intro - It's Thanksgiving. The brothers talk about what they're thankful for.

05:28 - I'm dating a girl right now, and things aren't going so well. The problem is she thinks things are going fantastic. We started dating when we were 16, and now that we're 21 I would love to start seeing other people and doing single-guy things. I know breaking up with her is going to kill her, but at some point I have to put my happiness first, right? How can I let her down as easily as possible without ruining our life-long friendship?

11:40 - Is there a polite, non-offensive way to ask if someone is gay? I have a friend and everyone who hangs out with him thinks he might be gay, but of course no one wants to ask him. It's not that we care one way or the other what his sexual orientation is, we just want to know, but it doesn't seem like something you can ask point blank. -- Wondering In Wisconsin

19:19 - Y - Sent in by Jakob Locker, by Yahoo! Answers user Edward Elic, who asks: "Could I eat an entire bag of pizza rolls without dying? My friend says I'll die or something if I eat an entire bag of pizza rolls (90 count) but I know that is complete poppycock. I'm a 15 year old girl who is 125 pounds. Will I die? Doubt it. Get sick? Probably."

26:36 - Internet Celebrities - Brent Black ("Brentalfloss") - Hey there three ami-bros! So, I've worked from home for a little over a year now. The majority of my weekday time is spent in my room. I've recently started to worry that maybe the lack of social interaction isn't good for me, and I remember that at least one of you works from home, so do you have any tips for how I can continue working from home, but still be a healthy, productive person? Thanks a bunch! -- "Schleppy the Wondertaint"

32:26 - MZ - Personal message from Davin Pablis. Advertisement for The Sound Of Young America.

34:41 - Y - Sent in by Miskullandulis, from Yahoo! Answers user Salim, who asks: "What are the risks of at home circumcision? My girlfriend gets freaked out by my anteater wiener. I am going to please her and get a circumcision, but I don't have health insurance. I will do it tomorrow after school, but I want to know what the risks are. I will be using alcohol and scissors."

40:55 - I've recently started a new relationship. Sometimes when I'm chatting with my boyfriend something that I did with my ex or something that happened while we were together comes up. Seems kind of tactless to keep saying, "me and my ex did this," or, "one time my ex said this," but I feel like I'm being disingenuous if I just say "my friend." Help me MBMBaM, which do I use, or do I just avoid these stories altogether and risk never having much to add to the conversation. -- Ex'ed Out In England

46:41 - This year is my first post-college Thanksgiving. Now that I'm in my own household I'd like to bring a dish to the meal; however, all the traditional Thanksgiving sides and desert are already taken. I don't drink wine, and there's already going to be a few bottles, so that not a great option either. What should I bring to Thanksgiving dinner. -- Stumped Over Stuffing

53:27 - Y - Sent in by Lisa Hollifield, from Yahoo! Answers user Way, who asks: "Why are you girls so damn mean when it comes to size and don't give me that love crap? Okay, this girl told me that if a guy doesn't have at least a six-inch penis erected then he better not have sex or show a girl his penis or they will laugh at him. I'm an eighteen-year-old guy, fully through puberty, and I have a 5.1 - 5.5 inch (ranging on good and bad days), but that's usually where I am so I'm really nervous. Also, it's not just this one girl, it's a lot of girls that say this."

55:58 - Housekeeping

61:39 - FY - Sent in by Alethea Eckhardt, from Yahoo! Answers user jkfnbm, who asks: "What would be a good tattoo inspired by the book The Time Traveler's Wife?"

Trivia

 * Griffin would go on to eat upwards of 24 pizza rolls in The McElroy Family Fun Hour Brought to You by Totino's. Justin would eat approximately 30 that same day.
 * The brothers mention their mother's recipes for Chess Bars and Ritz Tort, which they have later shared. Those recipes can be found on this page: McElroy Family Recipes.