Episode 348: Stardust and Dino Piss

Outline
15:33 - I've been dating this guy for a few weeks, and I went to his apartment recently. I found out that he lives out with two other people but zero tables. There's not even a kitchen table. Their kitchen area is just a pile of groceries. It's bothering me that my boyfriend doesn't own a table anywhere in his apartment. How do I buy a table for another person without it being weird? -- Tabletop Troubles in Topeka

21:36 - I just found out the guy I'm dating puts his belt on his pants before he puts the pants on his body. Am I good, or do I need to end things now before I realize he's actually an alien? -- Dating ET? in Boston

29:19 - Y - Sent in by Drew Davenport, from "YaDrew" Answers user Douglas (actually Yahoo Answers user Kat), who asks: "Is Willem Dafoe Trying To Tell Me Something In My Dream? I forgot about Willem Dafoe when I seen Spider-Man for the first time. (I was 9 when I seen the movie) and when I got introduced to him again when I watched Mississippi Burning, I had this dream about him: I was lying in my bed and closed my eyes and the next thing you know its black, I can't see a thing, then suddenly, Willem Dafoe pops into my dream from nowhere. He's smiling at me and so focused. He mouths something to me that is hard to see. It was like he was saying 'Thank you' to me. What does this mean?"

42:14 - So, my dad doesn't own a cell phone, claiming he doesn't need one. Instead, he'll use the phone at work to call us and tell us when he's coming home. If my dad is anywhere else though and needs to contact us, he will either ask a stranger to borrow their cell phone or ask an employee to use their phone. Just recently my dad called me and the called ID said it was McDonald's. I don't want my dad to inconvenience these people any longer. How do I convince my dad to finally get a cell phone? -- Second-hand Anxiety in Florida

47:55 - Y - Sent in by Amelia Burger, from Yahoo Answers user Dirk, who asks: "How did people know when to meet back in vampire times? I know that they wrote more letters and stuff, but back in vampire times, how did you make plans with friends? Did they just wait around all day and hope that they ran into each other?"

56:10 - I have a friend that I frequently communicate with via text formats (IM, Twitter, text messages), and this friend frequently, as a way of expressing playfulness or a joke, sincerely uses the winky emoticon, semicolon close parentheses. It gives me the absolute heebies-jeebies and makes me feel bad to look at every single time. What's a cool way to get my friend to stop being a text grosso? -- Skeeved by Semicolons

61:10 - Y - Sent in by Irham Wisesa, from Yahoo Answers user sharmista, who asks: "Does adding flavor to water makes it juice? Well I want to drink more water. And only way I think I'd enjoy it is if I add flavor but would that change the water into juice and not give me the same benefits as plain water?!"

73:20 - FY - Sent in by Brooks Oglesby, from Yahoo Answers user Franklin, who asks: "What does David Spade mean to you?"

Trivia

 * Apparently unbeknownst to the brothers, the Final Yahoo for this episode was the same as the one used for Episode 312: Face 2 Face: Live from Drowzee City.