"TWENTY-DIRT" was originally released on January 7, 2013.
We apologize for the audio in this week's episode -- not because we all sound bad, but because Justin sounds so good that it makes the other two sound like chumps. Also, we talk about Wienerville for about ten minutes, which probably also constitutes "bad audio."
Suggested Talking Points
07:21 - My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost three years, and we can both see ourselves in it for the long haul, but when we talk about the future I want to live in a beautiful apartment in the city, and he wants to live off the grid in a cabin in the woods. While I support being self-sustaining, I still want all the cushy amenities of life. Is there a compromise here? What would you do? -- Vexed In Vancouver
Is it acceptable to wear a Snuggie in church?
Have you ever seen anyone wearing a Snuggie in church? Do you wear one? If I went to church I think it would be nice to snuggle up in the pew with your Snuggie and Bible. They should make them in religious themed prints for that purpose.
18:43 - How do you get the cat-poopy smell out of your office when you're trying to do comedy? - Justin McElroy
19:54 - Hey brothers, should I eat mashed potatoes with a fork or a spoon? -- Mashed In Kentucky[Note 1]
25:13 - I frequent a nearby arcade, and when I'm there I like to play some of the games that give tickets for reward such as ski-ball. However, as a grown man I have absolutely no use for these tickets whatsoever. I usually look for the nearest child at the end of the day and give them a fist-full of tickets to brighten their day. However, I am worried this makes me look like a creeper. Is it acceptable to do? Should I just leave the tickets in the machine for kids to stumble upon theirselves, or should I just stop this entirely and just leave with a handful of spider rings every time? -- No Tickey, No Problem
33:39 - MZ - Personal message from Brit, Cam, Yassir, Adam, and Jones. Sponsored by Extreme Restraints.
Is it weird my bf wants a puppet show for his 30th?
He's never wanted anything before and if I ever ask he says "nothing". But today he said very seriously that he would love so much to have a string puppet show perform for his birthday. Should I book him one or is it weird for him to want that?
50:50 - Housekeeping
How did Fred Savage go back in time to narrarate himself?
On Cat Shit
- “Oh fuck. C'mon Hemingway, you're my favorite scentsy, don't let me down now! Let the smooth blend of sandal wood and fucking cherries wash over me and save me from this."
"I don't think that's what Hemingway smelled like. Hemingway probably smelled like pipe smoke and boner cream.”
- — Justin & Griffin
- “I eat mashed potatoes with a knife.”
- — Travis
On Year Slogans
- “My problem with "Twenty-Dirtteen" is that it makes us sound fucking stupid every time we say it.”
- — Griffin
On BIKE ME
- “You would be too excited when you handed over that laundry hamper of tickets. You would be too excited to just say, "I'll have the bike." You would involuntarily shout, "EAT MY DICK. EAT MY DICK, TILL. GIMME THAT SHIT. BIKE ME, DICK."”
- — Griffin
- “I'LL HAVE THREE AND A HALF MILES OF LAFFY TAFFY. FUCK I LOVE THOSE JOKES.”
- — Griffin
- The title goof appears in this section.
- Griffin asks about "doodads and whatzits galore," which is a misquote of the song "Part of Your World" in The Little Mermaid.