The Empty Bowl is a meditative podcast about cereal from cereal enthusiast Justin McElroy and Cerealously creator Dan Goubert.[2][3] Episodes are released roughly once a month, and feature news stories of upcoming cereal releases and reviews of recently released breakfast items. The hosts speak in a calm voice to make sure the show stays relaxing enough for sleep. The show is edited by Emily Loper.
At the end of each episode, the hosts sign off by saying, "Don't forget to drink the milk." Their running joke involves often forgetting, messing up, or modifying this simple sign off. The opening and ending theme, mixed with the soundscape of crashing waves, is The Sun Is Scheduled to Come Out Tomorrow by Chris Zabriskie.
Half of the proceeds from supporting the show go to Harmony House, a shelter in Huntington, West Virginia.
The Show[]
Hosts[]
The show is presented by Justin McElroy, cereal enthusiast, and Dan Goubert, cereal crypt keeper; cereal procrastinator; cereal omniprescence; cereal schemer; cereal finagler; cereal planner; C.E.R.E.A.L: Commited. Enthusiastic. Rational. Ethereal. Awesome. Love it; cereal mover; cereal shaker; three boxes of cereal in a trench coat; cereal centurion; cereal news and reviews farmer; veritable cornucopia of cereal insight; cereal necromancer of sorts; cereal sommelier; your manic cereal dream boy; cereal subverter of expectations; cereal deep thinker; am become cereal destroyer of bowls; cereal understudy; Dan Dan the Cereal Man; cereal milkman; cereal storm chaser; an electric aquatic creature that has the ability to see the future, in other words, a Seer Eel; a knight of the Breakfast Table; cereal sailor; cereal illusionist; a goofy little cereal guy; just cereaously happy to be here; of the cereal, by the cereal, and for the cereal; Cereal Magazine's Chexiest Man Alive 2022; your closest cereal confidant; a cereal's best friend or its worst enemy; Mr. Cereal Worldwide; a mere conduit of the divine word of cereal; King Vitaman's Royal Cereal Taste Tester; cereal renaissance man; cereal soundscaper; a man of many cereal words and deeds; cereal cartographer mapping the world's fertile grain fields, crunchy mountains, and milky oceans; a material boy, living in a cereal world; your Cereal CEO: Cereal Eater (Often); cereal estate agent; cereal shock jock; cereal demolitions expert; cereal showstopper; cereal statesman who states a lot of things about cereal; a mere bystander in cereal's world; cereal word... generator; your cereal chauffeur in this luxury breakfast limousine we call a podcast; cereal s'morecerer's apprentice; trusted cereal informant; cereal dreamscaper; whatever the opposite of a cereal plumber would be; the Cereal Whisperer coming soon to TLC; cereal influencer; cereal florist; a good cereal sentence writing guy; a cereal man with a cereal plan; one of the closest things to a cereal mascot; a walking cereal almanac of sorts; cereal stuntman; cereal ferryman helping usher across the cereals of old into this new strange great beyond; cereal chexpert, a cereal expert with a specialty in Chex Studies; cereal archaeologist; cereal; serial cereal surrealist; cereal ethnographer; ceral scuba diver; cereal biographer; the cereal champion; cereal podcaster of sorts; the internet's last true cereal cowboy; cereal cornothologist; your cereal first mate on this maiden voyage into the Frankenberry Sea of rose-colored milk; cereal enthusiast; cereal astrologer; cereal caretaker; merely a mouthpiece for the sacred word of cereal to speak through; cereal deep-sea diver; cereal meteorologist; cereal smith; Time Magazine's 2019 Cereal Blogger of the Year; a little on the fence about calling himself a cereal fan; cereal wayfinder; cereal mad scientist; true cereal blacksmith; on all levels but physical he is cereal; cobbler of cereal; soap boxer for the cereal movement; cereal architect; cereal butcher; just a humble cereal word farmer; striving to be a cereal monk; cereal chronicler; cereal pathfinder; co-host; cereal journalist; cereal expert.
Together they guide the listeners through a calm, relaxing, and cereal-focused journey, presented in a soothing fashion. Justin opens the episodes by sharing some thought-provoking advice, describing serene cereal-scapes or evocative musings.
Segments[]
- “We're going to talk about cereal news.
We're going to talk about cereal reviews.
And then we'll have some fun and cut loose.” - — Justin McElroy[4]
Cereal News[]
In every episode Justin and Dan discuss a list of newly released or upcoming cereal or cereal-adjacent products.
Cereal Reviews[]
During this segment the boys talk about what new cereal they have tried recently, where one can find them, and their opinion on them. Sometimes Dan performs a live taste test on the show, however considerately without any chewing on mic.
Cutting Loose[]
Power Ranking of All Cereals[]
A project where Justin and Dan calmly rank every cereal that's ever been created, in a random order. At the beginning of this project, in Episode One Hundred and Six, the list of potential cereals to be rated contained 942 contenders.
For the full list of Dan & Justin Rank Every Cereal Ever, either view the official spreadsheet, or click [Expand]:
| Rank | Cereal |
|---|---|
| #1 | Cap’n Crunch |
| #2 | Grape Nuts |
| #3 | Donkey Kong Jr. Cereal |
| #4 | Honeycomb |
| #5 | Country Corn Bran |
| #6 | Eggo: Homestyle Maple |
| #7 | Blueberry Cheerios |
| #8 | Count Chocula |
| #9 | Crazy Cow (Chocolate) |
| #10 | Cap’n Crunch's Treasure Hunt Crunch |
| #11 | Powdered Donutz |
| #12 | Strawberry Rice Krispies |
| #13 | IceBerry Pebbles |
| #14 | Hershey’s Cookies n Creme |
| #15 | Indiana Jones |
| #16 | Honey Dipps |
| #17 | Para Su Familia Cinnamon |
| #18 | Curves Fruit and Nut |
| #19 | Quaker Harvest Crunch |
| #20 | Corny Snaps |
| #21 | Quaker Puffed Wheat Sparkies |
| #22 | Harmony Cereal |
| #23 | Fiber One Protein Cranberry Almond |
| #24 | Fruit n Fibre |
| #25 | Razzle Dazzle Rice Krispies |
| #26 | Quaker Rice Crisps |
| #27 | Popeye Fruit Curls |
| #28 | Funko Cereals |
| #29 | Shopkins Cutie Os |
Ranking the Year's Best (and Worst) Cereal[]
In the last or first episode of a year, our cereal boys will rank what they believe was the best and the worst cinnovations (cereal innovations) of the last 12 months. Some years the boys also include Honorable Mentions, or elevate non-cereal but still cereal-adjacent products.
Expand the table below to view Justin and Dan's yearly judgements:
Episode Ninety-Nine: Top 5 and Bottom 5 of 2023[]
| Rank | Justin | Dan |
|---|---|---|
| Best | Great Value Kettle Corn Cereal | Frosted Lemon Cheerios |
| 2nd Best | Great Value Apple Fritter | Great Value Strawberry Lemonade Cereal |
| 3rd Best | Gingerbread Toast Crunch | Malt-O-Meal Strawberry Shortcake Cereal |
| 4th Best | Maple Brown Sugar Chex | Maple Brown Sugar Chex |
| 5th Best | Frosted Lemon Cheerios | Great Value Kettle Corn Cereal |
| Honorable Mention | Maria Gamesa Cereal | Maria Gamesa Cereal |
| Rank | Justin | Dan |
|---|---|---|
| Worst | ICEE Cereal | Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown |
| 2nd Worst | Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown | ICEE Cereal |
| 3rd Worst | MishMash Sweet Mac n' Mello Cereal | Malt-O-Meal Maple Bacon Donut Cereal |
| 4th Worst | Creamsicle Cereals | OK Go! Honey Bunches of Oats |
| 5th Worst | Malt-O-Meal Key Lime Pie | MishMash Sweet Mac n' Mello Cereal |
Episode Eighty-One: Top 3 and Bottom 2 of 2022[]
| Rank | Justin | Dan |
|---|---|---|
| Best | CinnaGraham Toast Crunch | CinnaGraham Toast Crunch |
| 2nd Best | Pandora Flakes | Peanut Butter Plentifull Cereal |
| 3rd Best | Strawberry Banana Cheerios | General Mills Filled Bites Golden Grahams S'mores |
| Honorable Mention | N/A | Cinnamon Toast Crunch Rolls |
| Rank | Justin | Dan |
|---|---|---|
| Worst | Cinna-Fuego Toast Crunch | Cinna-Fuego Toast Crunch |
| 2nd Worst | Elf on the Shelf Snow Cream | Wendy's Frosties Cereal |
Episode Sixty-Three: Top 5 and Bottom 3 of 2021[]
| Rank | Justin | Dan |
|---|---|---|
| Best | Dulce de Leche Toast Crunch | Apple Pie Toast Crunch |
| 2nd Best | Chocolate Peanut Butter Clif Bar | Kroger's Super Kaleidos Cookies |
| 3rd Best | Cheerios Oat Crunch, Almond | Cheerios Oat Crunch, Almond |
| 4th Best | Carvo Crunch | Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Krave |
| 5th Best | Chocolate Churro Cap'n Crunch Cereal | Clif Bar Cereals |
| Rank | Justin | Dan |
|---|---|---|
| Worst | Ghostbusters Cereal | Lucky Charms Marshmallow Clusters |
| 2nd Worst | Lucky Charms Marshmallow Clusters | Mister E Pop-Tarts |
| 3rd Worst | Monster Mash | Cosmic Brownies Cereal |
Episode Forty-Four: Top 5 and Bottom 3 of 2020[]
| Rank | Dan |
|---|---|
| Best | Tropical Froot Loops |
| 2nd Best | HEB's Morning Sunshine Cereal |
| 3rd Best | Green Onion Chex |
| 4th Best | Cap'n Crunch and Smart Food Popcorn Mix |
| 5th Best | Oatmeal Creme Pie Cereal |
| Honorable Mention | Chocolaty Churros |
| Rank | Dan |
|---|---|
| Worst | Shopkins Cereal |
| 2nd Worst | Mandalorian Cereal |
| 3rd Worst | Elf on the Shelf Vanilla Candy Cane Cookie Crunch Cereal |
| Dishonorable Mention | Funfetti Cereal |
Listener Answers[]
In some episodes, Dan and Justin come up with a cereal question for their listeners to answer. This can be a hypothetical such as "If you were the boss of cereal, what would your Divine Rule be?" or "What's your dream cereal?" that the listeners can weigh in on by leaving an audio message to be played on the podcast.
Listener Questions[]
Listeners can send in questions for the hosts that they may answer on the show. Questions can vary from trying to find specific cereal, personal cereal opinions, as well as cereal hypotheticals.
Episodes[]
| # | Title | Date |
|---|---|---|
| 118 | One Hundred and Eighteen | June 29, 2025 |
| 117 | One Hundred and Seventeen | May 11, 2025 |
| 116 | One Hundred and Sixteen | April 14, 2025 |
| 115 | One Hundred and Fifteen | March 2, 2025 |
| 114 | One Hundred and Fourteen | Feb 2, 2025 |
| 113 | One Hundred and Thirteen | Jan 5, 2025 |
| # | Title | Date |
|---|---|---|
| 112 | One Hundred and Twelve | Dec 16, 2024 |
| 111 | One Hundred and Eleven | Nov 16, 2024 |
| 110 | One Hundred and Ten | Oct 29, 2024 |
| 109 | One Hundred and Nine | Oct 8, 2024 |
| 108 | One Hundred and Eight | Sep 13, 2024 |
| 107 | One Hundred and Seven | Aug 16, 2024 |
| 106 | One Hundred and Six | July 28, 2024 |
| 105 | One Hundred and Five | June 29, 2024 |
| 104 | One Hundred and Four | May 28, 2024 |
| 103 | One Hundred and Three | May 5, 2024 |
| 102 | One Hundred and Two | Apr 07, 2024 |
| 101 | One Hundred and One | Feb 25, 2024 |
| 100 | One Hundred | Jan 25, 2024 |
| 99 | Ninety-Nine | Jan 5, 2024 |
| # | Title | Date |
|---|---|---|
| 98 | Ninety-Eight | Dec 15, 2023 |
| 97 | Ninety-Seven | Nov 16, 2023 |
| 96 | Ninety-Six | Oct 26, 2023 |
| 95 | Ninety-Five | Sep 29, 2023 |
| 94 | Ninety-Four | Sep 7, 2023 |
| 93 | Ninety-Three | Aug 18, 2023 |
| 92 | Ninety-Two | Jul 13, 2023 |
| 91 | Ninety-One | Jun 23, 2023 |
| 90 | Ninety | Jun 08, 2023 |
| 89 | Eighty-Nine | May 25, 2023 |
| 88 | Eighty-Eight | May 5, 2023 |
| 87 | Eighty-Seven | Apr 6, 2023 |
| 86 | Eighty-Six | Mar 23, 2023 |
| 85 | Eighty-Five | Mar 09, 2023 |
| 84 | Eighty-Four | Feb 17, 2023 |
| 83 | Eighty-Three | Jan 26, 2023 |
| 82 | Eighty-Two | Jan 12, 2023 |
| # | Title | Date |
|---|---|---|
| 81 | Eighty-One | Dec 30, 2022 |
| 80 | Eighty | Dec 15, 2022 |
| 79 | Seventy-Nine | Dec 1, 2022 |
| 78 | Seventy-Eight | Nov 11, 2022 |
| 77 | Seventy-Seven | Oct 20, 2022 |
| 76 | Seventy-Six | Oct 6, 2022 |
| 75 | Seventy-Five | Sep 8, 2022 |
| 74 | Seventy-Four | Aug 18, 2022 |
| 73 | Seventy-Three | Aug 4, 2022 |
| 72 | Seventy-Two | Jun 23, 2022 |
| 71 | Seventy-One | May 26, 2022 |
| 70 | Seventy | May 12, 2022 |
| 69 | Sixty-Nine | Apr 28, 2022 |
| 68 | Sixty-Eight | Apr 7, 2022 |
| 67 | Sixty-Seven | Mar 24, 2022 |
| 66 | Sixty-Six | Mar 03, 2022 |
| 65 | Sixty-Five | Feb 18, 2022 |
| 64 | Sixty-Four | Jan 27, 2022 |
| 63 | Sixty-Three | Jan 13, 2022 |
| # | Title | Date |
|---|---|---|
| 62 | Sixty-Two | Dec 16, 2021 |
| 61 | Sixty-One | Dec 3, 2021 |
| 60 | Sixty | Nov 4, 2021 |
| 59 | Fifty-Nine | Oct 14, 2021 |
| 58 | Fifty-Eight | Sep 24, 2021 |
| 57 | Fifty-Seven | Sep 9, 2021 |
| 56 | Fifty-Six | Aug 19, 2021 |
| 55 | Fifty-Five | Aug 6, 2021 |
| 54 | Fifty-Four | July 15, 2021 |
| 53 | Fifty-Three | July 1, 2021 |
| 52 | Fifty-Two | June 10, 2021 |
| 51 | Fifty-One | May 21, 2021 |
| 50 | Fifty | Apr 29, 2021 |
| 49 | Forty-Nine | Apr 15, 2021 |
| 48 | Forty-Eight | Mar 25, 2021 |
| 47 | Forty-Seven | Mar 11, 2021 |
| 46 | Forty-Six | Feb 12, 2021 |
| 45 | Forty-Five | Jan 27, 2021 |
| 44 | Forty-Four | Jan 2, 2021 |
| # | Title | Date |
|---|---|---|
| 43 | Forty-Three | Dec 15, 2020 |
| 42 | Forty-Two | Nov 27, 2020 |
| 41 | Forty-One | Nov 7, 2020 |
| 40 | Forty | Oct 16, 2020 |
| 39 | Thirty-Nine | Sep 30, 2020 |
| 38 | Thirty-Eight | Sep 3, 2020 |
| 37 | Thirty-Seven | Aug 18, 2020 |
| 36 | Thirty-Six | July 29, 2020 |
| 35 | Thirty-Five | July 8, 2020 |
| 34 | Thirty-Four | June 18, 2020 |
| 33 | Thirty-Three | May 28, 2020 |
| 32 | Thirty-Two | May 14, 2020 |
| 31 | Thirty-One | Apr 29, 2020 |
| 30 | Thirty | Apr 15, 2020 |
| 29 | Twenty-Nine | Apr 2, 2020 |
| 28 | Twenty-Eight | Mar 20, 2020 |
| 27 | Twenty-Seven | Feb 27, 2020 |
| 26 | Twenty-Six | Feb 12, 2020 |
| 25 | Twenty-Five | Jan 30, 2020 |
| 24 | Twenty-Four | Jan 8, 2020 |
| # | Title | Date |
|---|---|---|
| 23 | Twenty-Three | Dec 4, 2019 |
| 22 | Twenty-Two | Nov 20, 2019 |
| 21 | Twenty-One | Oct 23, 2019 |
| 20 | Twenty | Oct 9, 2019 |
| 19 | Nineteen | Sep 11, 2019 |
| 18 | Eighteen | Aug 28, 2019 |
| 17 | Seventeen | Aug 14, 2019 |
| 16 | Sixteen | July 24, 2019 |
| 15 | Fifteen | July 3, 2019 |
| 14 | Fourteen | June 19, 2019 |
| 13 | Thirteen | June 05, 2019 |
| 12 | Twelve | May 22, 2019 |
| 11 | Eleven | Apr 10, 2019 |
| 10 | Ten | Mar 20, 2019 |
| 9 | Nine | Feb 20, 2019 |
| 8 | Eight | Feb 6, 2019 |
| 7 | Seven | Jan 9, 2019 |
Merch[]
